Ch-ch-ch-Changes

[mrkilborn]

I certainly am not the one to talk about people leaving here. However, I have to wonder about people who make a pronouncement that they are leaving and then get bunches of replies to get them to not leave.

If you're leaving, just go! People will figure out you're gone and adjust. It's much less painful that way.

I am amazed at the things that have been going on here in just two weeks. The actions and comments I'm seeing are exactly why I have considered giving up. Whatever happened to decorum? And no, I don't mean your Martha Stewart interior.

"Just the terror of knowing what this world is about/watching some good friends screaming 'let me out'"

When I see someone like ryan_phillippe talking about exiting, then I know things have hit rockbottom. When cravenmoorehead has to call special meetings to deal with unruly players, there are serious problems with what's happening around here.

When people are turning their journals over to the adoption agency like depositing letters in a mailbox, something is very wrong.

I feel like I've come back to a place I've never been before. I'm Marty McFly in "Back To The Future Part II" and this is the alternate 1985... the one where Biff has all the power.

I don't know if anything can be done about this, but I'd like to talk to some people about these things, before I decide what my next move is.

Feel free to reply.

Comments

[jodi-lyn.livejournal.com]

Feel free to reply.

oh, believe me. i will. that was incredibly rude what you said, about just getting up and going. you don't just abandon something and not tell your friends that you're leaving. you don't keep them wondering. you tell them why you're going, and you explain yourself. i can't believe you would say that, because next time you can just direct that to a person, instead of beating around the bush. it's not as if we don't know who the hell you're talking about. i never told anyone to tell me not to leave. i just stated the fact of why i was deleting and the reasoning behind it. it's the least i can do for them.

bullshit like this is the one of the exact reasons i'm deleting. and i frankly don't care if i get hate replies to this. because that was just really uncalled for. i'm done.

[mrkilborn.livejournal.com]

Good Luck, Jodi Lyn.

[jodi-lyn.livejournal.com]

thanks.

[affleck.livejournal.com]

If you're leaving, just go! People will figure out you're gone and adjust. It's much less painful that way.

We're going to have to agree to disagree on this one, Kilborn. If someone I interacted with on a regular basis just up and disappeared, I'd be a lot more pissed off than if they said, "Hey, I'm done, I'm deleting/abandoning/whatever."

I think it's only fair to have a little warning.

[mrkilborn.livejournal.com]

Mm. Well, I think there are ways of doing it without as much fanfare. You could send an email to the people who need to know, fr. instance.

[joeylaurenadams.livejournal.com]

This is not directed at anyone, but I think we've all had the thought enter our minds that someone is announcing their impending departure as a means for attention. I've been around since October and have seen many leave only to return. Some made sense and others didn't. We all view each other differently than the next person. I wouldn't want us all to agree, as diversity it was keeps us going.

I have to say, I prefer having an idea that someone is leaving. It can be a private conversation between us or a public announcement. I don't think it needs to be some big dramatic presentation. Again, this is a general statement. You can always explain things in comments if someone asks you to.

There are people who are either leaving or considering leaving that I do not want to see go. Even if we don't speak, I appreciate your contributions. Anyone who can make me laugh is someone I want to stick around.

The unruly player issue is something I'd like to see disappear over anyone leaving. Sadly, I think in the case of certain people, this entire game would fade away before they would change their proverbial stripes.

There ya go. It's 5 am, this may be far from impressive or sensible. ;)

[mrkilborn.livejournal.com]

It's true. There are no "absolutes," but there ought to be some sort of rules that we do consider. Maybe that's what I'm talking about.

[cravenmoorehead.livejournal.com]

Faker Adoptions has always had a lot of traffic, and very little of the traffic there is people who are really leaving. They're just people who have too many journals.

The unruly player issue is done, at least in the community. If people don't want to deal with him, it's obviously up to them to not read his journal or to block him from commenting in theirs, but in terms of going to the community and seeing all of those posts and arguments, that's over.

One person returned who I was very happy to see return and I know that circumstances changed around that, so I'm not gonna say too much on that.

Interesting points, though. I love talking to you about this stuff. I'm glad to see you back, and if you look at the mailing list, I did notice that you were gone. I didn't know that you were going anywhere and I was worried that you were Ghandi. I'm glad you're not.

[cravenmoorehead.livejournal.com]

Furthermore, I even think that people who say they're leaving really aren't, they're just cashing in their chips and starting with another journal. When that's the case, I wish people would make that clear. It's really bad for morale otherwise.

[c-diaz.livejournal.com]

Do you mind if I rub that bald head? That has got to be the sexiest thing since I don't know what.

[cravenmoorehead.livejournal.com]

Go for it, sexy girl.

[parkerposey.livejournal.com]

For once I think you and I actually may disagree. I personally HATE knowing people are other characters. I get veyr upset when people let it slip to me. Or even knowing whether the user is male of female. It REALLY irks me. You know that personally, because I've stumbled across you and was amazed. When i find out that so and so is actually this other person, it's too weird for me. Like an obligation to like them. Or I see the similarities between the two that i would never normally see.. sorry to sya it but ALOT of multi-characters play the two exactly the same way, just under a different name. I think it's great that people want to stick around, even as someone else.. just don't tell me.

I personally have been making an effort to branch out more. This came before the yahoo shite. I am going to IM one new person each day and try to interact with their characte rmore. I think that will break up the "clique" that I know I've created and fallen in to. Parker's world consists of the same 10 people. Sure parker is not the easiest one to handle, but she's not the worst. I do think that Parker is very secluded and only likes very few people, but I think maybe I can change my characters opinion on that and 'grow" not just stay so stagnant.

I personally think it's better to get a goodbye than nothing atall. When people just disappear there's the hope and wonder if they will return. For example, Marla.. she doesn't know if Matthew is gone, abandoning or just plain busy. She's carried on their storyline without him even being around. If he does decide to leave it would be nice to let us, the people he interacts with, know about it. I agree with Josephine when she said that yes.. it does seem like a lot of people do it for attention, it does. We can't really do anything to stop that. When Craig left, we were all wondeirng what the fuck. Was that the last we would see of him? What about the people who interacted with him? It leaves things very unsettled and unfinished. Therefore when someone decides to move on, after not hearing a word, then that person Does return.. you feel fucked. I think it's common cutesy to say you're leaving and just get it over with. Let people voice their opinions. Some people DON'T want others to leave and some do. If Josephine were to say it, I sure as fuck would beg her to stay.. neither she or I should be condemed for that. I really don't like when people say "Don't worry, I'll still be around as someone else" I HATE that. i don't want to know. It shouldn't be broadcasted. I try to skip over that shite.

I say when you're going, say goodbye and just go. Make it sweet and simple, if you feel the need to explain, go for it, but all the explanations are always the same and they don't change anything.

(And damn, is there EVER going to be a time when i don't end up writing a fucking novel?)

[cravenmoorehead.livejournal.com]

I guess I'd just rather know that someone isn't tired of this altogether, or that the person will still be around in an unrecognizable format, just to prevent that feeling of "everyone is leaving," but I can see where you're coming from, too.

Don't worry, I write fucking comment novels myself. :)

[mrkilborn.livejournal.com]

I think I agree about seeing the clockworks of the characters. Who needs that? And yes, even if people are doing multi-roles, they really should be different. Unless... someone decided to play Mary-Kate and Ashley for example.

For me, though, talking ooc is pointless, since no one here knows me!

Maybe I'm looking for some maturity from the players that just isn't there.

Even so, I'd rather stick to high standards than stoop to the LCD. If that's offensive to people, then, call me a stink bomb and open a window.

[mrkilborn.livejournal.com]

I always appreciate your thoughts C Man. Sometimes I may not completely believe all of the points I raise, but I want to toss it out there to get some reaction, and find out where others stand.

I'm not Ghandi yet! I love the steaks at Dan Tana's too much.

[c-diaz.livejournal.com]

Love you Craiggers!

:)

[mrkilborn.livejournal.com]

:)

[c-diaz.livejournal.com]

I understand what people are doing when they have a good-bye post, Some people don't go OOC and they are honestly saying goodbye to all of us, or for whatever reason. That sucks, but i totally understand.

Personally, If I ever left, I probably wouldn't do that. Mostly because I hate goodbyes. I would probably just pick up and leave, like you said. But that's just the way I am. Reckless Abandon is my middle name.

But, I understand everyones view points in the issue, including yours, Craig.

Now let's fucking play this [game] and have FUN already. :)

[mrkilborn.livejournal.com]

I guess I feel that a "goodbye" means you are leaving and are never coming back. It seems overly dramatic to me... but maybe I'm being "overdrama" oversensitive. Who knows?

You always make it fun Cami! ;)

[amanda-latona.livejournal.com]

Hey Craig. First of all let me say I am very happy to see you back, I did miss you and wonder where you'd been. There're a few people around here I'd be very upset to see leave the game and you're one of them. I'm sorry it got that annoying for you. I agree with everything you said. I'm not sure I would announce going, and with some people you know it's just not true. I also agree that when Phillippe leaves it'll be the saddest goodbye on LJ. I'm hoping it never happens.

[mrkilborn.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Corporate Latona!

I'll try to remain for a while!

[ryan-phillippe.livejournal.com]

[Wooo, snide icon.

I didn't mean for people to think I was going anywhere. I'll be around for awhile. If I did leave I actually don't think I'd tell anyone. I'd just give the journal to someone else and hope no one noticed and if it was the right person I really don't think anyone would. It's been done before.

Yeah, good to see you.]

[mrkilborn.livejournal.com]

Thank you, Wry!

That's a good thought about role turnover.

Good to see you, too!

[debra-messing.livejournal.com]

Try to concentrate how Biff ended up in the end of the first movie.

I don't remember how the second one ended, so that's all I got for ya ;)

[mrkilborn.livejournal.com]

Ha!

Well, Biff was the Car detailer in the first one, and he wound up getting killed in the second one.

All's well that end's well!